Classic debates, as settled by Google:
LIBRARIANS vs. ACCOUNTANTS: Maybe you hate fun. Perhaps you just can’t sleep. If you’re in search of a good cure for insomnia, you should reach out to a librarian or an accountant. One good story about the Dewey Decimal System and/or GAAP accounting should put you right to bed. But which of these trusty professions is LESS boring and MORE fun?
GOOGLE SAYS: Librarians, with a whopping 2.6 million hits vs. a paltry 1.7 million for our accountants. They might be ordering an audit check on this one. (And, in an amazing twist, it turns out that librarians may actually be more fun than clowns. Shame on you, clowns.)
GOOGLE SAYS: Wall Street… Is this at all surprising?
GOOGLE SAYS: Yes… Beautiful people get 7.7x more hits than ugly people. If this is applicable to real life, then you should never, ever, go to a bar with a beautiful person. She’ll get 7.7 free drinks to your measly one. I would de-friend anyone who is more beautiful than you.
GOOGLE SAYS: What the… From now on, I am blaming teenage illiteracy on Katy Perry. You don’t know how distressing this result is for me. What’s next?? Are “gurls” going to “twurl” around school? Will we be ordering ice cream with chocolate “swurls”? Is Maytag going to be challenging “Whurlpool”? Kill me now.
GOOGLE SAYS: A resounding victory for Democrats! Of course, this very scientific approach may have some flaws. It could simply be that Dems are more computer/tech savvy than their Republican counterparts. Or it could be that Republicans simply prefer using old school communication methods (perhaps carrier pigeons and/or messages in a bottle). And, of course, a direct translation of this result would presume that Communists actually outnumber Republicans. Just another example of the dirty, liberal media, right?…OR, is (Commie) Red the new black? Google never lies…